| Monday, January 01, 2007 |
| Who meets my needs? |
Stormie Omartian, in her book The Power of a Praying Woman says:
"Every woman has needs. But many of us are guilty of looking to other people to meet them - especially the men in our lives. Too often we expect them to meet the needs that only God can fill. And then we are disappointed when they can't. We expect too much from them when our expectations should be in God." She then goes on to quote from Kissed the Girls and Made Them Cry, by Lisa Bevere:
"[For centuries women have] wrestled and waged war with the sons of Adam in an attempt to get them to bless us and affirm our value. But this struggle has left us frustrated at best.... In the end, it is all a senseless and exhausting process in which both parties lose. It is not the fault of the sons of Adam; they canot give us the blessing we seek, and we have frightened them by giving them so much power over our souls. We must learn that the blessing we truly need come only from God." Stormie then says:
"We will never be happy until we make God the source of our fulfilment and the answer to our longings. He is the only one who should have power over our souls."
Heavy stuff. Already, only a few pages into this book, I feel convicted. I have for so long believed that I would make a wonderful wife. That my purpose is to be a wife - supporter, helpmate, cheerleader, and so on, for my future husband. I have put marriage and being a wife up on a pedestal. And knocked God off in the process.
My prayer is that I can replace God on that pedestal. That I can acknowledge to Him my desire to be a wife, to have a companion, a husband; acknowledge the fact that I think I would make a good wife. But to be able to put that desire aside and let Him fulfil me, give me purpose for me, not me as an accessory to another. I need to repent of my actions over the summer, of pressing on with a relationship with P because of my desire for him to be husband material (which I can see now why that would not be). To repent over my transferring this desire on to S in my hunt to find a man - any man! - who would have me. To turn away from that hunt and turn towards the God who puts desires and dreams in my heart. To become the woman that I need to be to either be a wife, or to be of service in my singleness to God for the rest of my earthly life.
So today I repent and turn away from my old way (and shall probably have to do this tomorrow, the day after and so on until it becomes a habit), and turn towards Him to meet the needs I have. |
posted by Calia77 @ 12:44 pm  |
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